This email is rambling, but I think you can get the gist of it. I just woke up, it's 2:30 a.m. and there is loud lightening and thunderstorm out there. Of course the booming thunder jolted me out of sleep....

Yesterday morning, I was the only one of the three lawyers and one secretary who work in my office that had arrived at work. I had decided to go to work unusually early (8:30).

It was primary election day and my partner, Noemi had gone to vote and to an early dentist appointment, so she was due in late that day. I later learned that she exited the subway station a couple of blocks north of the office just before the first tower fell. She was ok, but none of us knew of each other’s fate as we could not find each other for hours. My secretary had the closest call of us all. She exited the E train under the WTC and somehow managed to get back into the subway along with people escaping the towers who were covered in soot. The train pulled out just before the first building fell.

First of all, everyone in my office is fine. I was the only one at work when it happened. My office and my windows face the twin towers diagonally across the street so I saw everything.

I'm ok, but I think I'm still in shock from what I went through and witnessed.

It's been a very difficult two days, processing everything that has happened. This city is completely in a state of shock.

I was in my office at 8:45 facing the trade center across the street when the first plane hit. I almost fell out of my chair. It was the loudest sound I have ever heard. It wasn't just the sound, but also the force. I could feel it as though it pushed against me.

The first thing I saw was that the sky was filled with paper. I still didn’t know what had happened. I opened the window and looked up and around and saw a massive black hole, several stories from top to bottom, in the WTC. There was debris everywhere. It was about a minute since I had heard the explosion. I called my mother and then my friend, Barry, frantically trying to find out what had happened. I was shaking and as I realized what I was actually seeing across the street and I started to lose my composure. I found out it had been a plane, but I didn't know it was an intentional attack. I decided to go to the street, I don't even know why. I remember that I couldn't think, I could only keep seeing images over and over in my mnd. I couldn't process their meaning. For example, at first I didn't perceive myself to be in danger.

I ran to the street and was standing three-quarters of the way down the block (Vesey Street) that separates my office from the WTC. The streets were packed with people everywhere. Everyone was staring up at the 1 WTC on fire. Most people in the street did not have any idea what had happened. We saw smoke and after a few minutes we started to see people jumping and falling. We were so close we could see what they were wearing. We could see their arms and legs waving and kicking. It was the most horrible sight. Each time a body fell people screamed, really wailed, in horror. The screams were actually one of my worst memories because they were piercing in their intensity. After we saw four or five men and women fall or jump from the high floors----and since they were falling 80 or 90 stories your eyes just glued to them for what seemed like several seconds----suddenly, with no warning the second jet collided with 2WTC. The second plane caused an enormous explosion, the fire ball was in the air right above us. I know debris rained down, but I only know this from watching the TV now. At that moment we all just turned and ran as fast as you can imagine. I didn't look back.

After running only about 20 feet, I came by an alcove entrance to the NY County Lawyers Association, which is locate on the south side of my office building. I was afraid that I was going to be trampled so I ducked off the sidewalk into this doorway. Everyone tried to get the door open to go inside, and after some struggle we were successful. There was a lot of pushing and shoving. Some people fell down and others were tripping over them. I thought I'd take refuge in this building, but I realized I didn't want to be on Vesey Street. So I tried to get out. For a second I panicked, thinking I was trapped, but I ran past everyone streaming in and got out. This was the scariest moment I have ever felt in my life. The street was a mob, complete pandeonium, total chaos. Everyone was screaming and crying. With tears running down my face, mouthing the words "Oh My God" over and over I ran back to my office to use the phone to find out what was happening, because there was no one to tell us where to go or what to do. At that point I didn't realize that this was a terrorist attack.

There was so much confusion. We couldn't actually see the second plane from the street right below even though we were looking straight up, we just heard and saw in live time the massive impact and then the biggest ball of fire and explosion you can imagine.

Then I decided to go home. For a reason I cannot understand, I stopped in the Duane Reade in the lobby of my building and bought a disposable camera. I left my building. No one knew what do to. There was no one to tell us where to go. There were police everywhere, but they were mostly trying to keep the street clear to get firetrucks and police cars down to the WTC, where as it turns out many of these early arriving would-be rescuers ended up being killed. I zig zagged trying to figure out where I was supposed to go. I wound up on Church street when the first tower fell, and I just ran and ran. I was about three or four blocks away from WTC when it started to fall. Luckily I moved fast enough and got away from the buildings before the dust and debris could hit me. Throughout I stopped to take pictures with the disposable camera, though I cannot explain why in all my fear, running from the dust cloud I would stop to take a picture. I ran like a madman until Canal at which point I thought I was just going to collapse was drenched in sweat. I was weaing a wool suit and had a back pack on that was heavy because i had filled it with all the files I thought I might need if I couldn't' come back to work for a while.

Then the second building fell. Everyone was running and screaming, people were falling and getting trampled on. It was absolutely terrifying. I spent another 2.5 hours walking home. Imagine millions of people in the streets, no subways, everyone fleeing north. Literally millions, because everyone in every neighborhood was out of the buildings and in the streets.

I can't imagine going back to my office. I hope it's still there. From what I hear, it seems very likely my building sustained some damage.

I feel incredibly lucky, though. I was not injured... at least I am physically unhurt.

(My ex-boyfriend, A, was in Miami at the time this happened. He actually called my cell phone as I was standing looking up at the trade center in front of me between the time the first jet hit and the second jet hit. He was on his way to the airport to go to Chicago for a business meeting. He had heard the news on the car radio of jet #1, called me to find out where I was. I hung up with him just before the second jet hit, and he didn't hear from me again for several hours.)

One person I know, Terry McGovern, found out her mother was killed in WTC. Terry and her partner had just had a child. Today she has been on CNN with pictures of her mother and her baby, talking about how her child will now grow up without knowing her grandmother. It is obviously very depressing.

The city looks like it's under martial law. Everywhere there are sirens, now for two entire days. It's hard to imagine, but the city is just walking around in shock. Today there were additional bomb scares, so people are not only deeply sad but also very jumpy. I think I'll go to synagogue tomorrow.

It doesn't seem like there's much else to do. I can't get near downtown.

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